Event #169: Saturday, January 8, 2011

I had a strong sense of visions last night, many, in a series, and it was hard to pick all of them up. But I’m pretty sure that one of them was [finally!] one that I’ve been asking to see. It was her sleeping. As amazing as it sounds, I am pretty sure that I was treated to a picture of her, or someone else, lying down in their longhouse. There were so many other pictures. I need the ability to control the speed at which they move by me, as I can’t focus on them that quickly. But I do remember that one; the rest have faded away just like a dream would.

Later, Bob was getting the stoves ready this morning for yet another chimney cleaning. Obviously, we are having some kind of problem, as we keep having to have them cleaned. Third time in less than a year. But on the good side – we’ve not yet had to buy oil this year. We last bought oil in late 2009, and have not bought it since. Bob was very conscious of keeping at least an ember from the back stove burning (for her sake), and moved a few chunks of them outside to stay burning in the chiminea outdoors while the chimneys were being worked on. When the chimney guy arrived, he was initially alarmed to see that there was smoke coming from the back of the house, but I immediately assured him that the stoves were cold, and that was the chiminea. He didn’t pursue it, and I’m glad because I am not sure how I would have explained why we were burning a fire in the chiminea in the snow. Bob was doing his absolute best to keep the fire going for her, because he knows how important it is to her. But, then he came up behind me typing here with a big sigh.

“Uh oh”, I said, “are you being reprimanded for the fire?”
“Well, not the fire…” he said and continued, “This is something I’ve been thinking anyway…”
“What’s that?” I wondered.
“That our lives are insane and wrong. That everything we’ve been doing is wrong; everything we do, our society, the regulation, how we feed the government, work to pay money… ‘How did you get like this? is how she phrased it.” Bob explained, and continued,
“I have from her an overwhelming sense of insanity or wrongness in the way we live our lives… she was just… there, letting me know just how wrong what we’re doing is. We pay for all this insurance, we tolerate government regulation… we are just an insane people in her eyes. How we live to feed the government. But right now I have to go feed the fire, because she wants me to do that.”

Bob came back later with more, as every time he went into the back of the house there seemed to be another contact. This time it was:

“My father would never have lived like this” Bob said that she told him.
“Meaning you as her father then?” I wondered. “How did that come across?”
“Just.. in Lenape – but I understand it.” Bob said. “I just get a picture, and a strong sense of her, and then she communicates and I understand it. All morning I was laying in bed, and I felt like we don’t even belong here. That one just now was overwhelming, I just feel like I’m in an altered state cause it was such a clear indictment of me.” Bob continued.

Later, I went upstairs, and I’ve inserted a picture below of what I found. After what Bob perceived as ‘an indictment’ of himself and how we live, I found his character on the dresser turned to face the wall:

Everything is the same except... Bob's character is turned to face the wall.

So after all this, I will record what I did on the dresser, in case there is a change later. This is since Bob was turned to face the wall. I have put all of the remaining plant sprigs into a jar. The 4 characters are arranged along the back of the dresser, facing front, Nuttah to the far left, then me, Bob and Kate on the right. I took all the hearts and they are pointing out into the room, lined up in the very front of the turtle that is closest to the front of the dresser. That’s about it. I am however, beginning to wonder if keeping the fire going is such a good idea. They apparently don’t like what they ‘see’.


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