Archive for ‘Lenape words’

January 13, 2013

“A Perfect Breeding Ground” for Trout


This was my reply to Bob’s email about the vision he saw in the last post:
Jan. 11, 9:06 AM: I have to run my car to the repair shop, then I will be back, and I will write a proper email. You said something last night, clear as day, but in your sleep, because I responded back to you and you didn’t say anything. What you said was:

“It’s a perfect breeding ground”.

I said “What is?”, and you rolled over away from me and apparently were never awake. This was about midnight, 12:30 maybe.

I knew there was a presence as I heard the vibration. Actually, I still do this morning. Don’t like the sound of your “vision” very much.

blackfoot-river-pictureBob, later, 9:28 AM:
“Wow,you heard the statement??!! It was in English?! obviously!! It was not English when I said it to Nuttah, it was in Lenape. It was a reference to the land they showed me. It was a perfect setting for the spawning of trout, the way the land sloped and the large pebble-bottomed pools of easy running water in the river, perfect spawning grounds, perfect shelter/structure. It appears to be in the west, which makes sense. I am not feeling good about this at all.”

Me: Yes, you said it clear as day in English. There was no question to me what you said, and I glanced at the commercial that was on to see if you were responding to that and had been awake — but you weren’t. Course I didn’t know WHAT you were talking about, and then I thought, well, he couldn’t be “there” because you said it in English. But you didn’t there, that’s interesting. I plugged in your two words as a phrase at “Talk-Lenape.org” and got nothing, so I plugged each Lenape word in separately. The first word is “a pretty place (such as a park)”, or “good land”. The 2nd is “Freedom”. Just like you said. You got the spelling perfectly. When you say in the west, are you talking western US or western PA? With everything else that has happened I know we have to pay attention to this “dream”, but don’t know how. How was it made clear to you that we’d have to leave? How is Nuttah and baby doing?

A couple of days later, there was movement of the objects that were on my bedside table. I don’t seem to have a picture of that, but I guess it involved the flowers that she arranged there in December, the tiny little white asters. I don’t really know what to make of Bob’s dream/vision, or the “perfect breeding ground”. I had not initially realized how detailed his vision had been of where we are supposed to be going, eventually. I just hope that this is not a reality in the semi-immediate future, we’re pretty comfortable here where we are, and I hate to even imagine what might precipitate this.

January 11, 2013

Will we have to leave the “Land of the Turtles”?


A couple of days later, Bob sent me this email:

1/11/13, 8:15 AM Bob: Had a disturbing “dream” at some point last night, woke very upset. Saw a preliminary “planning session”, more like a sweat lodge stint. It was followed by a ceremony in the main long house to “listen to the ancestors” via smoke and ornaments placed at the four directional points. There was a meditation involving Nuttah and some “leaders” that I have not seen before. The purpose of this was to get direction on how to properly honor the ancestors/spirits involved in the freeing of their land and people from my “buddy”.

Then it got depressing. They showed me some pretty disturbing stuff, not unlike what I have seen before for our area. Different this time because it was made clear that we may likely have to leave, (this is an approximation) Tulpehakink, (“the land of the turtles”) which, I think, is where we live (their land) and go to, funny, as I am writing this I am hearing the words in my mind:

welakamike nihelatamweokan (well-ah-ka-mee-kay/ Nigh-la-tom-wee-o-kan)

I am not sure what it means exactly, but it is essentially escaping our land to freedom/safety. It is  pretty disturbing, a sense of foreboding has been with me all the way in and is still, I was listening to C2C and it is like the dream was tied to this show. I had to turn it off because it was too disconcerting. Niko was clearly disturbed this morning, waiting on the stairs when I came down, growling at something. He had pooped on the floor in basement, I cleaned that up (roughly). I let them both out, Stupey would not come out of crate, literally had to drag her by collar, don’t know if that was because it was a routine change or whether the presence/sensation was so strong that even she felt it. Enough of that, too unnerving.

An Indian Migration

Me just narrating: Bob’s first Lenape word there, “welakamike” translates literally (from the site “Talk-Lenape.org“) as: “a pretty place (such as a park); good land”.
The second word “nihelatamweokan“, translates as “Freedom”.
Used together, I am guessing that this phrase means a place of “good land” where we can still be free. But “the land of the turtles”, or Tulpehocken / Tulpehakink will have to be abandoned. Unfortunately, this is completely in line with guests that I hear on Coast-to-Coast. I still resist becoming one of those “preppers”, but how long can we ignore the clues? The messages have been repetitive, and they have been clear. And it is not one single source that they come from, but several.

I looked up the “Coast” program that Bob refers to in his email, and found that it was about this:

“Author and researcher Larry Kelley joined John B. Wells to discuss scenarios preceding the decline and demise of great civilizations, such as the United States, and how lessons from history can provide solutions needed to reverse the downward trend.”

If we can.

December 13, 2012

A Circle of Flowers in December??


Bob wrote me this email on December 12: I slept right through last night, woke to strong drum and rattle this morning, heard it all the way until I pulled out of the driveway. Still a little haunted by the cave thing at the Christmas craft show on Sunday.  I wonder what the message was/is supposed to be.

Then later in the day Bob called me at work and reported that  Niko was restless, unsettled, climbing the stairs and just can’t relax; very distracted, pacing and sniffing all over. I was curious as to what this might mean, if anything. Bob was, as usual, asleep when I got home, and I tip-toed up to the bedroom to check around. I first look on my bedside table and  I was just simply amazed at what I saw there. It was a beautiful display of flowers – yes flowers, on my clock radio! Nuttah had arranged a small circle of tiny, very tiny, white wildflowers on the top of my clock radio on my bedside table. There was also a little pile of hearts and a turtle involved. The flowers totally fascinated me, and I went peering closely at them in the darkness to try to determine what they were. Where, on December 12, did she come up with flowers? I guessed that they were a small kind of white aster. Asters can grow very late into the fall… and it was true, we had not yet had any really freezing weather by this time in December. Cold, yes, but there must be some areas of warmer micro-systems where these flowers could still be alive. I’ve included some pictures below. I took them that night, while the flowers were still relatively fresh. I took so many, I’m surprised I didn’t wake up Bob with my flash:

2012-12-12-Circle-of-Flowers-1
2012-12-12-Circle-of-Flowers-2
I’ve also included these two close-ups of the “Circle of Flowers”. I really am not sure about the Aster determination. What is the significance of this small circle, so delicately laid there, surrounding a heart? I have it here from a couple of different angles.
2012-12-12-Circle-of-Flowers-3

The next morning, Bob wrote me this: There was a lot of drumming and activity last night. Niko/Keme, which I believe roughly means secret or hidden (something along those lines) was very aware, tried to get up from the basement, was certainly disturbed, hasn’t done that before as far as I know. Did you notice anything? Drumming? I was completely out of it this morning when I got up, not that it means anything, could just have been sleeping deeply I suppose, but felt different.

Bob was as yet unaware of the “flower-circle”, so below is the email where I tell him what I found:

Me: Yes I was aware of the drumming, heard it as soon as I came in. Came up to a big change on my table — I photographed it last night so I could get the flowers “fresher”, but they haven’t lost much as of this morning. The silver heart-charm is encircled in a ring of beautiful little flower-heads, right in front of Nuttah. I don’t know what they are, asters maybe, that grow late into the fall. Don’t think we still have any around, but maybe in a micro-climate somewhere. I’ll send the picture when I get back. I’m sure that is what Niko was reacting to, but he had settled down by the time I got home. Guess we will now know whenever they are around. I’d let him up sometime, see how that goes.

Finally, now, I also have a translation for the keme word that Bob has been hearing in reference to Niko. It is not keme, it is kimi. It means “Secretly”, as I found out from the site “Talk-Lenape.org“. I was trying to look this up when Bob first mentioned it in November, and couldn’t find it without a context. But why “Secretly”? What does that mean in reference to Niko? It’s pronounced as if in English it would be spelled “keemee”, no wonder Bob spelled it “keme”. Long e’s, just like Mimi.

English: secretly
Lenape: kimi
September 2, 2012

We Found Out What Happened


There is a part of me that never wanted to post what came next. It is with the same trepidation that I posted the events involving “the Evil One”, and how he impacted Bob’s life throughout the summer. It was almost as if to write about him enhanced his reality. In the same thought that I think that may not be possible, I also think that anything is possible, based on our experiences. The fall was to be a time of great anxiety, and it started with the return of Nuttah, finally, on September 2, 2012, after the 6 weeks of absence which I wrote about at length.
Feather-BarIt had been more than a month since we’d heard from her. Going back in my ongoing log that I’d been keeping, I determined that we’d last heard from Nuttah sometime in July, and that “event” was nothing really major. I kept reminding Bob that they did have harvest to attend to, she was pregnant, lots of reasons why we may not have heard anything. Bob had a feeling of foreboding about her absence that he couldn’t shake, which I mentioned before in a prior post. So on September 2, we were out in our driveway helping pack up “Rue”, who had been visiting for the weekend. I noticed 2 of our homegrown peppers on her car hood, but I thought Bob had put them there for her to take home. He thought the same of me. Rue said thank you for the peppers, and Bob asked me if I picked them at almost the same time I asked him if he did it. Neither of us had. Rue then went inside to get ready to go, and when she was out of earshot, I said to Bob,

“Do you know what that means?”

“Maybe”, Bob said, “Are you sure you didn’t do it?”

“Yeah, I didn’t — you didn’t — Rue didn’t; it’s got to be Nuttah, nobody else would do it, especially that.”

Bob was inclined to agree, but was hesitant to truly believe it, it was almost too good to be true.

We'd been sitting in the creek on a warm day

We’d been sitting in the creek on a warm day

After we got inside, we were waiting for Rue to get ready to go and I jumped on the computer because I was so excited to write up the appearance of the veggies on Rue’s car. Bob came into the house and I had a thought. I was about to go ask him if he’d sensed her at all when we’d been sitting outside in the creek; the 3 of us, Rue, Bob and I. I charged out of the office with this thought, since the appearance of the vegetables had sparked it, and ran right into him. He grabbed me to stop me, saying, “Our daughter is here…” (I knew he didn’t mean Kate, so he could mean no other than… Nuttah).

Bob was very emotional saying this, “She’s HERE!, She’s right here, can you feel her?”
I could not. “Where!?” I asked.
“Right here, she’s hugging us.”

I wish I could feel that. I wish I could sense her, I don’t. We all three stood there at the bottom of the stairs, embracing, me trying to feel the presence that Bob felt.  Rue was upstairs showering, and I was afraid that she’d come out.  Something seemed to be delaying her, which I was thankful for. I hugged Bob hard as he was so emotional with the reappearance of Nuttah after more than a month. It was the longest absence to date in almost 3 years.

tomahawkThen something started happening to Bob. We’d been standing there, apparently all 3 of us holding each other, and all of a sudden, I felt Bob start to go limp. I thought he was going to collapse onto the floor, so I slowly helped to ease him down. I didn’t want him to go limp and fall and hit his head on the banister. There was no doubt in my mind that he was going “there”, because I had witnessed this already a couple of times. And then he started uttering Lenape words and tones, and I knew it was complete, he was “there”. He was kneeling on the floor, and now started to get tense. It lasted a few minutes, maybe less. I was paranoid the whole time about Rue coming out, I knew Bob would not want to explain any part of this to her, and neither did I. She has more or less forgotten anything we told her about it in the past and never brings it up anymore, and we don’t either. I was hoping he’d “come back” before she  finished upstairs, but I really didn’t want to interrupt the process that Bob was going through either. Given what was going on, I doubt that I could have interrupted, I don’t think Nuttah would have allowed it. I kept saying really softly, so as not to interfere, “What’s happening, what’s happening??”; because I could tell that whatever Bob was being shown there was not good. Then soon, his tense, stiffened body seemed to relax, and I could tell he was back with me. The guttural intonations stopped, and his breathing changed. I knew that whatever he’d been seeing was very emotional, disturbing, it reminded me of the time he’d gone back to find out the male wolf had collapsed and died. But sadly, disturbingly, utterly heart-wrenchingly, this was so much worse. I hate to even report what has happened, because if you’ve been following the blog, and if you even remotely believe that Nuttah and her little Lenape tribal group are real, then this will come as a deep shock. Where she had been for 6 weeks was on the run and in hiding. They actually still were, and I’m not sure that where Bob saw them was “here”, where they used to have an encampment. I don’t know how she was able to contact us, or if it put her in any further danger, I hope not. I will put in the next post what apparently happened, but the bottom line is that the disappearance of the “Evil One” from here, meant that he was then “There”, and has been wreaking havoc with Nuttah and her clan. He is truly evil. I wish that there was something we could do. They want Bob to help, and he had to say “no”, his duties are here.

June 30, 2012

Bob Takes a Time-Travel Trip for an Important Lenape Ritual


Bob wrote me this email on the morning of Friday, June 29, about an event that occurred during the night:

I had a wild night last night, woke exceedingly confused, can’t stop thinking about it. I left the program last night, big time, like in the beginning. Down the wormhole sort of stuff.

I was sitting around a large, hot fire, way too hot for my liking, especially considering how hot it is/was there and here. It was somewhere upstream of the village in a clearing. [I was with] Nuttah (looking fairly pregnant), the two old joints, 4 other old joints and 4 young, really strong and fierce looking men; I had the distinct impression of warriors. All were in a semi-circle around me with my back to the (very hot) fire. There was a long period of them just sitting silently heads leaned back towards the sky, in what looked like a sort of meditation. Then they all stood up and I did too, don’t know how I knew to, guess it just made sense and then each of them came up to me individually and stared at me intently, no more than a foot away, just stared into my eyes. This went on for several minutes each and several rotations, 4 cycles to be exact. Each of the old joints were wearing a pendant reflecting the four cardinal points, the young joints had the symbolic cardinal points painted on their chests. Nuttah and the familiar old joints were wearing pendants.

On the web, this directional circle is being described as a “Medicine Wheel”

After the rotations finished they placed a young ear of slightly yellow corn on the ground in front of me followed by some black coals from the fire, some red berries and a white flower. All the colors of the cardinal points, except these were Meso-American associations, although I don’t know enough to know whether it was the same throughout the Americas. Could be I guess. Either way it was. They all then sat back down and so did I, they all went into a meditation again, heads leaning back. One of the old joints started to chant after what seemed like forever, I was getting concerned about what was going on at this point. They all then began to stare intently at me while the one old joint chanted.

Within a few minutes I started to feel as though I was drugged, started having hallucinations, or I guess they would say visions, wild shit, flying above the trees, then suddenly back on ground in the midst of a fight among warring tribes (that was some wicked stuff, awful) then in the creek spearing fish and netting them in the traps they set, all these various scenes, several scenes of hunting parties with Tëme, walking along side with his mate, that brought the best feelings and the most comforting, as well as sadness.

Then there were scenes here of just everyday life, pretty mundane by comparison, mostly us around the property in what I believe must have been early spring.

Then, back, sitting by the fire. They started to move together into a small circle and converse, as I was sitting trying to listen, I really couldn’t hear well. I started to look around the perimeter of where we were, once my eyes adjusted to the darkness and distance I saw mommy wolf and two pups (not so much pups anymore). I can’t be absolutely sure of this, but behind them, in the woods, there appeared to be another, almost white wolf, or at least very blond, it was so odd I am not positive that is what I was seeing. But that is what I think I saw, I could’ve been imagining it.

Then back to the group, they broke up their little “meeting” and Nuttah walked towards me and knelt in front of me with the arrangement between us. She started to speak to me in Lenape, which I surprisingly understood, or not so surprisingly.

She started telling me that there was complete agreement, I started thinking agreement about what?? She said I did something, here in the early spring that confirmed to all of the other joints what she had been sure of for “many cycles”. Apparently I did something that either proved something to them or changed something. I am also not allowed to know what it is as it might compromise other events. I had a distinct date in mind all the way to work and now. The date I keep thinking of is April 4th. No idea why or what it could be, can’t possibly remember the specific day. But that is the date that came to mind and is becoming more steadfast, for what that is worth.

Then Nuttah got up, came to me and sat beside me. She put her hand in mine and then I woke up back in bed. I was way disoriented and more than a little confused. It was 2:57 AM on the clock. Must have fallen immediately to sleep because the next thing was the alarm going off and me being totally bewildered. Amazing how the mind can adapt when it has to. I was able to force myself back to this reality pretty quickly, much quicker then in the past. Still bewildered and out of sorts, but functioning. Fortunately, today I have the time to record this on a PC rather than a device. That about covers it.

April 20, 2012

Bob has a visit with Duke-Tëme


There were a couple of things that happened the weekend of April 14-15 that never got logged into the journal. I did take pictures, but because it was a weekend, we never wrote back and forth about it, only spoke about the happenings. But I do have photos that documented the events, the first of which was when I came up to the bedroom sometime Sunday, I found Nuttah’s character sitting on my side of the bed next to a vase of spring flowers. From the looks of it, we have some bleeding hearts, violets, and what looks like the shadbush buds in bloom. There is also the small, silver heart-charm on the bed in front of Nuttah. The picture of this is to the right.

The same weekend, I photographed this arrangement on Bob’s side of the bed: Duke-Tëme and a heart were arranged on Bob’s clock radio to look at him. This was to be a prelude to Bob later having a “dream” about them:

Then on April 18, 2012, Bob wrote me this email:
I had an interesting dream last night. Your Mom (in her Lenape guise), Nuttah, DUKEY-Tëme!! were all imploring me to be more like I was, more like the father of Nuttah. Duke-Tëme came and sat beside me, it felt so good to feel his head against me, I can’t tell you.

Nuttah said “he will be with you”, then she made some sort of motion with her hands, like an incantation, followed by your Mom doing the same thing, sort of like a circle and acknowledging the cardinal points.

Then your Mom said “Your woman will need you, be aware.”

I said to them “I am not afraid, my nemesis should be“. Nuttah smiled and just said “Father”.

Your Mom looked satisfied, said “Care for them, stay well”.

I can still hear them talking, really strange, I hear it in Lenape, but can immediately translate. This all happened in a few minutes standing in the woods by the creek in a BRILLIANT moonlight. Nothing like what we will ever see.

Duke-Tëme, my Mother and Nuttah are moved to MY bedside table.

Me to Bob: When I came up last night (the first time was shortly before 11), I was curious to find Duke-Tëme  on MY side of the bed. So Nuttah, my Mom and the Tëme were all in your dream and are on my bedside table? I was wondering about that. Glad you were able to have a “visit” with them. I don’t really see any other changes. I thought maybe you had done it because the fan was blowing things, but guess not. Interesting dream otherwise. Since I haven’t had any dreams despite my pleas for what’s going on, I’ve switched it to something specific. I’ve asked to be shown the artifact in a dream. Persistence may be the key.

I noticed, looking at this picture later, that Bob’s special stone is also in the picture. This stone almost always only pertains to Bob, and I think it is a rare event that it is used in one of my arrangements, so I am not really sure how to interpret this. In front, there is also a series of hearts pointing at the whole group.

April 5, 2012

Another Adventure to the Lenape World


An excerpt of email sent by Bob: April 4, 8:15 AM

Woke up completely out of it this morning. Spent a portion of my night away from home. Did you notice anything? I was back by the creek, upstream, watching the white bird ceremony. The group of guys covering themselves in the mud and something else, not sure what. The old joints were participants, but not in the active manner as the others, more just chanting and shaking rattles occasionally. I sat back in the woods with Nuttah, Mom wolf and the pups. Just watched. The ceremony ended, the men that were covering themselves in stuff went into the water and washed, the bird just sort of hovered around, clearly not afraid. The old joints walked back to us. They started their stuff about being prepared and said what your Mom said to me about needing to survive to take care of you in the event things start to fall apart. I must be more like I was when I was younger, more like I was here (I believe that is a reference to being there and being Nuttah’s father). Be aware of what is around you, you should not be alone. He will find you. ??? I said “who and why”. No response. Thanks. All I got from the old joints from my questions was something I remember from before, they repeated it 3 times, I can still hear it as I write “alewi ki kuwatu” , almost sure I have that right because I hear it, may be off by a letter or two. I know what they were saying when I am there, it becomes somewhat more vague as I remember it, but I will see if you can find anything, I think it has something to do with me knowing the answers. Nuttah said to me “kaski lesiv” or something to that effect, not so sure on that one, but she also repeated it 3 times, she held my hand and squeezed it tighter each time she said it, not sure if it meant anything or if it was her just becoming more urgent. And then it was over and I woke standing in the bathroom. I’m starting to think they have a stake in my survival that goes beyond just caring, maybe not Nuttah, but the old joints. The one old joint travels to the creek for these ceremonies and for the “meetings”, he is not part of their clan/group/village whatever you want to call it. I have forgotten a lot of what I used to know when I was going to see them on a more regular basis!

Excerpt of my response: April 4, 8:50 AM

I found myself for some reason on a post of 4/5/11 and it was about the first white merganser sighting you had: 2 regular mergansers and the one all-white one. The first “alewi ki kuwati” reference in the blog happened on 4/1/10, and that post was about when you found out how she lost you. “Alewi ki kuwatu” is “you know more“. (I have that in the heading of the blog too). I’ll look up Nuttah’s phrase. The other thing I noticed was the buzz pretty strong last night, and then the night before, she had moved her character back to your bedside table. “Kaski” means “You can”. The other word I’m not finding. Any context? An English word I can search on? There does not appear to be a “V” in their language, I could be wrong, but maybe it’s like the Gaelic, which uses a “bh” for “V”, or another combo? The ceremony last year happened on May 26, 2011, that one by the creek where they were smeared with mud. Interesting night though! It’s been a long time. I didn’t notice anything overnight, except I had some pretty vivid dreams.

Then I spent some time trying to look up the translation of Nuttah’s Lenape phrase, and found only this:
How about this for a translation:
kàski në laihòsin.
“You can do that”
Closest word I could find to “lesiv”

Curiously, I am re-reading this and posting it several months since it happened. Reading the part about that mud ceremony in the creek, it reminded me of the first time I’d written about it over a year ago. And I wondered if this ceremony had a special significance for them, so for the first time, I actually did an internet search for “Lenape Mud Ceremony”. It turns out that there is something related to mud, and it is part of their “creation story”. I found this site that describes it quite well. So for the 2nd year, Bob was taken there to be part of this ceremony. The only odd thing is that they occurred on different days of the year: May 26, 2011 the first time, and April 4, 2012 the second. So maybe it has more to do with moon cycles, planetary alignment, seasonal events, than an actual fixed “date”.

February 15, 2012

Event #302: Tuesday, February 14, 2012


kenamëwakàn kpëmawsi - "Thankfully, you are alive"

Tuesday night (Valentine’s Day) I came home from work to find another napkin on the coffee table with Lenape words written on it. (Gotta remember to put out better paper, these napkins do not produce the best scans) Also, when I went upstairs to check the dresser, there was a change with the characters. I’ll take a picture tomorrow morning. I did write Bob an email to ask him when this “event” occurred. My suspicion is that something happened after we hung up the phone that evening, as Bob had not mentioned anything.

I wrote an email to Bob that night about it: “When did you write that napkin? Was it after you talked to me? There is a change on the dresser too. I was able to translate your word — one of the spellings was right on, but when did that happen and was there anything else?”

In the morning, 2/15, I had this email back from Bob:
I was in bed last night after talking to you when I heard Stoop scramble and whine like a 2 year-old. Got up and as soon as I started down the stairs I knew Nuttah was there, as well as someone else, but I don’t know who. She just held my hand, very tightly, which is a very odd sensation when you can’t see anything doing it. I got a clear word of “kpëmawsi“, or however it is spelled and another word of something like “kenamëwakàn“, very clear, but I don’t know what it means. It didn’t sound like it was bad though. And then everyone was gone, in an instant. Stoop came back like nothing happened and jumped back on the chair ignoring me.

Then mine: The word Nuttah was saying means literally, “Thankfulness”. I guess the phrase then could have meant “We are thankful that you live” or “We are thankful that you are alive“, or “Thankfully you live“.

Kenamëwakàn kpemawsi. I am very grateful that they saved Bob. Obviously, things could have been very different, had it not been for their intervention. For Bob, everything since has a rather surreal air about it. There was also a new arrangement on the dresser, that kind of echoes that, and I’ve included it below. If you compare this to the recent picture in event #301, our characters are all more tightly scrunched together, and Nuttah has positioned herself between Bob and I. We are all bunched in front of the Duke/Tëme character:

The 2nd new arrangement after Bob's life is saved

February 11, 2012

Event #300: Saturday, February 11, 2012


Saturday morning, the day after his major life-saving incident, Bob got up before me, and was downstairs tending the fire when I came down. I saw a napkin laying on the coffee table that had me immediately excited.

“What’s this!?”, I exclaimed, picking it up and seeing Bob’s scrawl of Lenape words. How long had it been for Lenape Words!

“I had a visit this morning.” Bob stated without much emotion or excitement. I think he is still completely perturbed by the event of yesterday – we both are. Bob continues, “I can’t believe Stoop didn’t wake you up, the way she scrambled out of here.”

A little explanation: Stoop is the only dog we have left now (out of 3). I gave up my little towpath Wobbler to our son, Stewie, who took Wobbles to his new place, new job, new apartment, out of state. It was supposed to be a move good for all, except I do miss my little towpath Wobbler. I still wobble, I just take… Stoop now. She doesn’t do as well as Wobbles, she’s a little older, but she is gradually getting used to it. It’s been about a month now. And since she is by herself, she is now IN the house with us, living upstairs in our living space. I was always curious how this would go with a dog and the “visits”, rather than Joe-the-Cat who has just become a haggard, diabetic, old man, a mere shadow of his former self over the time he’s dealt with these “visits”. (He is, after all, 17 years, which is what in cat-years, about 100?) Joe of course, is the one who has “seen” the most. Well, we got our answer. Stoop scrambled. She couldn’t get out of the room fast enough, paws and claws scraping on bare floor trying to get a footing to escape. That’s why Bob thought she might have awakened me, the mad scrabbling on the floor. She didn’t bark or whine, just got the hell out of there. And Nuttah had arrived to say something to Bob, as she came and grasped his hand with both of hers saying: “kpëmawsi”.

A new Lenape word said to Bob: kpëmawsi

“Well, I don’t think I even have to look this up”, I said, pretty sure that I knew what it meant. “Do you? Was there anything else conveyed as she said it?” I wondered.

“No, that was pretty much it, and just as quick she was gone”. Bob said.

I took the napkin with the words in to the computer to check on talk-lenape.org. There really isn’t “words”, it is just one word, spelled a bunch of different ways as Bob tries to sound out and spell the foreign and ancient language that he is hearing. kpëmawsi. I’ve added a scan of the napkin with his progression of the word as he tried to understand it. He actually got it right in the 2nd variation. And it’s meaning?

You live.

Yes, he lives. He lives because they saved him. He would have been killed by the drunk driver careening through the intersection, bottoming out, sparks flying, not even making it much further as Bob was to find out later. But at least he crashed himself and not Bob. And why not Bob? Because Bob’s brakes were applied by some other force, stopping him in about 20 feet before certain-fatal contact would have been made. It’s hard to write that, knowing what could have happened. Bob went through the weekend with an air of unreality about the whole thing, hardly believing he is still here, and kpëmawsi – he lives! We are so thankful for their intervening on his behalf. Life-changing hardly begins to describe it.

September 24, 2011

Event #251: Early Saturday AM: Sept. 24, 2011


The next night was Friday night, 9/23, and we had an obligation we couldn’t get out of. We attended with heavy hearts and kept a brave face throughout the evening, but both went to bed miserable. Luckily, we were exhausted, because I doubt either of us would have slept otherwise. About 3 or so in the morning, I awoke to Bob ‘rolling’ out of bed. I say rolling, because when his back is bothering him, rather than get out of bed normally he kind of rolls out, and then straightens up slowly after his feet are on the floor. He groaned a couple of times too, or kind of grunted. I rolled over to look at him, he was kind of kneeling on the floor next to the bed and grunted again. I rolled closer to see up close, and to ask him if he was alright. He didn’t answer, just more sort of unintelligible grunts. His left hand was up to his forehead, the elbow propped on a knee, and his right hand on his right ear, or at least the right side of his head. I thought, briefly, did the phone ring, and I didn’t hear it? Is he responding to someone on the phone? But the telephone was in its cradle on his bedside table. “Gheean” said Bob. I thought he was talking then to our brother in law “Gene”, and I looked for the light of a cell phone, knowing he does not bring that up to the bedroom. “Who are you talking to?”, I inquire — but almost as soon as I say this, I realize that Bob is not here. I mean he is here on the floor in the bedroom, but he is “gone” – gone there, and the sounds he is making, the talking he is doing is “there”. I can hear him – and his voice is audible here, but it’s clear to me that he is there. How was this clear? He was speaking Lenape – it suddenly became clear to me – fluent Lenape  —  and at the point this realization comes over me, an entire phrase in Lenape comes out of Bob’s mouth, not even sounding like Bob’s voice, perfect Lenape language, the way I’ve come to understand it, with the perfect Lenape inflection.

“Wtëlinàmën” – I’m pretty sure is what I heard, and again:
“wtëlinàmën”

I could also tell that whatever Bob was witnessing there was getting him really upset, and witnessing this, I was getting upset as well. I had the sense it might have something to do with Duke. He was drawing in his breath sharply, sighing deeply as he let it out. Then all of a sudden, Bob goes completely limp, and collapses to the floor. He’s now laying on the floor by the bed, barely breathing, and I put my hand on him to make sure he still was. I was greatly torn between shaking him back to “here”, or leaving him alone. I can only imagine what is going on “there” and I did not want to interrupt the process in the hopes that maybe he was being shown where our Duke was, maybe having an encounter with him. Then, before I’m forced to do something, he slowly, almost like it’s causing him great pain to do so, gets up to kneeling again, and there are more fluent Lenape words.  I realize in a short while, because his breathing has somewhat changed that now he is “back”. Back fully conscious in the bedroom. I was in tears. “Did you see him”?? I croaked out in a choking voice, asking about Duke and hoping beyond hope that he’d been able to see where our Duke went.

“No.”
“Then what, what was it?”
“It was bad – I can’t talk about it, I just want to go back to sleep.”
“But what about Duke, did you learn anything?” As much as Bob clearly didn’t want to talk about what had just happened, it was going to be impossible for me to just turn over and go back to sleep.
“No. Nothing about Duke. It was about the tëme – the wolf.”
“What – what about them?”
Slowly, chokingly, the words coming out with great difficulty, Bob said, “Not them. Him. Only the male. He’s dead. Nuttah showed me the grave.”

Hearing this, all the horror and sadness of what had happened Thursday with Duke was welling up in me, and now it seemed like it was not even just Duke.
“When!? What happened to him?”
“She said 2 days ago, he just laid down, and he died.”
“Oh my God, I killed both of them!” I was almost hysterical now, I couldn’t believe this horrible outcome. Two days ago was when Duke had left us and I was there with the vet, and I was responsible.
Bob tried to console me that it was not my fault and that they did not hold it against us, but it didn’t work. The guilt, the sorrow, the horror that welled up in me was unbelievable. Now it was not just Duke gone from us, but the Papa-Wolf, the father of the 3 new young pups, and the mate of the Mama-wolf. I have never met the wolves, the tëme; I’ve never yet “gone there”, but the stories Bob has told me of them are as real to me as if they are pets. And I know how much they mean to Bob, meant to Kitchi, and mean to the tribe. This outcome was just too much to bear, compounded with the loss of Duke. How could this happen? How were they linked? Are they the same animal? Too many questions to ponder, unanswerable questions. I don’t know that we’ll ever answer these questions. I couldn’t sleep after this. I laid awake inconsolable ’til after 6 am, unable to cry anymore, and miserable beyond belief, trying to distract myself listening to the radio. Bob was awake most of this time too, but we were both too sad, distraught, and tired to talk about it anymore.

The next morning, unslept and feeling raw, I looked up the one clear memorable Lenape phrase that I’d heard Bob say: “wtëlinàmën?”
“What happened to him?” is how it translates. There is no clear answer yet to that question.