Posts tagged ‘Liquid Motion’

March 28, 2011

Event #200: Sunday, March 27, 2011


Excerpts of our emails today (Monday, March 28) although we are speaking about something that happened Sunday evening:

Bob: Also, before I forget, did you come up around 10:20 very briefly last night? I heard very slow footsteps that seemed like they took an awful long time to come up the stairs and cross the room, then I fell back to sleep for a minute, woke again and no one was there. Joe the Cat was on the bed. Very much a cat. Just wondering.

Me: No that was not me creeping across the floor – I was still in the office then. Doubt I would creep across either. I did hear a pretty serious buzz in the ear though last night, which is no longer a daily/nightly event. There seemed to be numerous visions when I went to bed too, but nothing that made sense. Just random, current-seeming stuff that had no meaning to me. One was 3 beautiful ‘vintage’ sleds lined up against the fence along our driveway. Why? I wasn’t even thinking about that. Other stuff came streaming in fast and furious, but I can’t remember any of it now, except that one really clear one of the ‘Flexible Flyers’.

Bob: Well, if it wasn’t you and it wasn’t Nuttah, I don’t know who it was, but I sat up and looked and didn’t see anyone. No idea what is going on with this new twist, or if Nuttah even has anything to do with it. It was pretty distinct though, pretty weird.

Bob & I talked then later Monday, when I was still at work. He brought the incident of Sunday night up again, and asked me again, if it wasn’t me that he heard ‘creeping’ across the floor. I don’t really creep; Bob sleeps pretty soundly, and with my normal moving around, I don’t have to worry about waking him up. Bob is a little concerned about this latest ‘twist’ in events. He is pretty sure that it is not Nuttah, and it’s about the 3rd time now that he’s had an experience with whatever this new ‘entity’ is. However, last night when I did come up to the bedroom, I heard what I interpret as her ‘buzz’, pretty loudly for the first time in awhile. And then when I shut my eyes, there was instantly swirling motion, the liquid motion I have not seen in awhile either. I don’t know what the change is — a new flower downstairs, the sound, visions, the missing book… Bob’s encounters… something is new and different.  I got home tonight around 10 pm and again, opening the door of the truck in the driveway, I was aware right away of the sound — the buzz. It was loud again upstairs as well. I’m headed up to bed soon, so we’ll see what happens tonight.

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February 6, 2011

Event #180: Sunday, February 6, 2011


Nuttah and I seem to be playing this game of “hearts”. (Funny, I play that game a lot on the computer – “Hearts” – it’s a card game) I point one of the hearts at her, and then I come back to my desk and find one pointing at “me”! This has happened 3 times in the past 2 days, including just recently while Bob and I were in the other room.

Overnight: when I laid down last night, which was actually still Saturday night, I heard the “Buzz” in my ear unusually loudly. And it was rhythmic, almost musical (but more or less monotone). When I got up this morning to tell Bob about it, I related it as if I was possibly overhearing (was it “leaking” through?) a ceremony, where they were drumming and doing rhythmic chanting. It kind of had that sound, but I hear it as a vibration. Maybe if you were deaf, and you could feel a vibration or hear a dim vibration of music being performed, but not the music itself, perhaps that is what it would sound like.

Similar to what I see in my vision; this is from "GraphicLeftovers.com"

Then, when I shut my eyes, for the first time in awhile, there were colors and fluidity in my vision; the liquid motion. Bright royal blue blobs, turning to a deep purple blob, sometimes a flash of white brightness. Any color was always in the deep purple to blue range, very fluid. Sometimes, I would also get vision flashes like I was moving through a corridor with windows, and the windows faced out onto something outside of the corridor that I didn’t have time to look at. And then, for the first time, I also had this other sensation as I “looked” into the scene of motion in my closed-eye vision. I felt that if I could train my eyes to focus in a certain way, that within that scene of fluidity, was what I really wanted to be seeing. It was dark, but there seemed to be some stillness to it, like I was looking at a scene on the ground. What it was, I could not make out. All I can really say about it, is that it seemed to be there. And my eye needed to be better trained. Or my brain… one or the other, or perhaps even both. Sometimes, I can’t get away from that sensation that I just don’t have the knowledge or skill to achieve these … That slowly, slowly, she is trying to train me, my brain, to pick up on things. For instance, a year ago, I did not hear that sound at all. And only towards the end of the summer did I begin to pick up the visions. And each time it happens, I try to notice more – is there a difference to the sound this time, am I hearing it somewhere else in the house? Does it have a rhythm, a cadence, and what might that remind me of? Reminding me of something is almost impossible, as these are life experiences that have not happened in this lifetime.

When I sat down at my desk this morning, my character, next to Nuttah to the side of me here was the way I’d left us last night, and I’d pointed all 3 hearts at her. They stayed that way as I sat at my desk all morning, and about an hour ago, I got up and made some breakfast for everybody, and I’m just now getting back here… the silver heart now points at “me”.

January 21, 2011

Event #175: Friday night, January 21, 2011


The latest re-arrangement of our characters on the dresser

As we laid down Friday night to go to bed relatively early, as we were both totally exhausted, Bob reported that the previous evening, before I got home, he had heard lots of noise in the bedroom and downstairs below us. I asked what kind of noise, he said it was just a lot of “activity”.

And then that night, I had visions again for the first time in months; the swirling blue, smoky, cloud-like visions. I also knew that Nuttah was in the room (I could hear the buzz), and she also left evidence in the form of a re-arrangement of our characters on the dresser, of which I have included a picture.

A pretty good representation of the swirling blue smoky visions that I get (image from "Bigstock.com")

For the first time, I felt that the smokiness in the vision was really like smoke coming from a fire, and if I could just see through it – to something – there did appear to be something on the other side, or some scene that I might be able to pick up. It is so hard to try to see these things, it’s like you can’t “try”, it has to be delivered to you. I had a brief, quick, flash of a vision again as well, I think it was before all the blue swirly stuff started. The thing in the vision was green. It was being thrust through a small space at me. Maybe not “at” me, but toward where I perceive myself to be in this vision. Not a hard green thing, but possibly a plant, material, or cloth, or fiber, or… corn husks? I don’t know. It had a smooth texture, more or less. The color was like that of corn husks. But what WAS it and why was it being pushed at me? It was a very brief flash, at best. I asked to see it again. I asked to know what it meant. I got the swirling blue smoke instead. It reminded me of that scene in “Sixth Sense” where the girl under the makeshift tent is pushing at the boy her memory box that contains the tape that shows how she died. I don’t know why, but that is the scene that comes to mind.

Our wood-stove fire again; never realized the sunburst effect of the grill 'til now

Regarding the smoke, I keep reminding myself that apparently it is through the fire in our downstairs stove that the ancestors are able to “see” us. They see us through the fire. If the fire is going, it creates a connection, perhaps kind of like the thread that connects Ria and Leoni in the “Entangled” book Bob and I both just read. Nuttah is very insistent that the fire not go out. I believe she has been tasked this responsibility by the elders. Bob keeps wondering what she intends to do in the summer? Or maybe she is wondering what we intend to do in the summer. Turtle sits in the closet with the medicines and the Antacids. Is it perhaps a sacred spot for them next to the creek?I don’t know why, but I have a feeling that there might be a route through our bathroom closet too. Perhaps sort of like the “wardrobe” in the Narnia books. (“The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe?”) Bob thinks that where our closet is, is the exact location of something that was sacred to them. Remember, there were often little plant sprigs in there (always the Evening Primrose), and now the pewter turtle still sits on one of the shelves — see his picture to the right.

I am freezing in here this morning. We tended the back stove all night, but not the front. It’s 58 in my office, and when Bob woke up it was 4.1 degrees outside. What did they do when it was 4 degrees? I don’t even want to think about it, but I’m sure 58 would have felt downright balmy.

January 6, 2011

Event #168a: Thursday, Jan. 6, 2011


Excerpts of our emails the next day about Event #168:
Bob: I suspect we had activity last night. I was having some extremely vivid dreams of the creek, sweat lodge and longhouses last night. I woke up and had company, there is a connection between fire, sweat lodge and ancestors/history. I guess that is why our fire is important. I should have put that together sooner.  I also see where the creek is at her place in relation to our house, at least at this point the egde is about where the bathroom is, there was some sort of “altar” or at least a few items placed at the edge as an “offering”, I think. The most prominent was a turtle shell. Of course this might simply be a dream, including being awake, I might have dreamed that also. But Joe was initially freaked out when I came up and then calmed back down, maybe his need for routine overrode his fear. Did you have any awareness of Nuttah being around? I get concerned when I don’t hear from her. Like I said, I don’t know if this was strictly dream or not, there was also something to do with the “meteor stone” in the offering arrangement, whatever, the more I think of it the more I think it was a normal dream.

The pewter turtle is in the linen closet now (the teabag? Sometimes I grab a tea bag to take to work, and then empty my pockets in here later - obviously I didn't use it.)

Me: No, I wouldn’t disregard it. I knew when you told me about Joe that I’d be coming home to a new arrangement on the dresser. And sure enough. It’s the most changes I’ve seen in a long time — the biggest ones being the weighty-pewter turtle is in the bathroom closet, and your meteor stone is moved to the center of her turtle on the dresser. The grouping of us is changed around as well as my plant sprigs for her. We all have a “heart” pointing at us — all 4 of us there on the dresser.

Each character has a "heart" pointed at us, along with the other changes

The "Turtle on the Dresser" now has Bob's "Meteor-Stone" as part of it

I sensed “something” when I closed my eyes, swirling, motion… thought I would have a vision, but I also was really tired, and I think I was asleep in minutes. It’s the closest that I’ve come to a vision in a couple months I think. Got up to go to the bathroom and had it again. Sound-wise, the hum/vibration was very distant, dim. I thought she’d be there after the dresser changes, so I listened carefully. At first it wasn’t there at all, but then I could hear it dimly, far away, not like sometimes it is, sounding like a motor under the bed. So I think that you might have actually had an excursion, and it was not a dream. Think more about the fire connection, and what you remember there.

Bob: The turtle in the bathroom closet is interesting, that, I think, is the edge of the creek, also where the offerings were set, I think I saw nuts, maybe chestnuts or something like that. Those red berries were there as well as what I think was dried squash and corn???, not real clear about that. Some other things like ornaments, I think. It is dark and only fire light to “see” with. The fire connection to the sweat lodge and history makes sense now. It is integral to the experience. Something to ponder.

December 10, 2010

Event #153: Friday, December 10, 2010


Email excerpt from me: I got woken up again, had bizarre images in my head this time. I’ll try to write them up, not sure even how to describe them.

In this case, I really did feel like I was awakened to be shown something because the images were so obvious. What I mean is that it was obvious I was being presented images, it was just not obvious to me at all what they were. I’m still trying to figure that part out, but here’s how it went. I woke up at 4 AM again, and again had a difficult time getting back to sleep. I was not aware of her in the room, I had no sound in my ear. I wondered about that, and I also wondered if it was possible to “summon” her with my thoughts. I laid awake for over an hour listening to the Coast-to-Coast radio program, and I think I finally faded off again by 5. However, shortly I was reawakened by a motor sound. This sound did not seem like the “buzz” I am now used to when Nuttah is present. I felt like it was a truck motor or it even sounded like it could be the furnace. Only if the furnace was running in the front of the house, I’ve never been able to hear it, and I don’t think that would start now. So I decided it was probably someone on the street warming up a diesel truck. That was feasible, because people on our street do have diesel pickups. But it went on so long, it was kind of beyond a normal “warm-up” time. Then I felt like I was also getting “her” sound… and I became confused in my half-somnolent state about whether that was the sound I’d been hearing all along. And right about that time, I heard the “engine” sound outside change somewhat, and soon enough, a diesel pickup drove by the house, and took off over the bridge. So it HAD been someone warming up. But after that sound was gone, I continued to hear her “buzz”. And it was then that the visions started. I was getting the bright light in the center of my inner-head vision. It would go in and out, sometimes I would just get the usual “eyes-closed” darkness in my head, and then I’d get a flash of her light. There were a lot of swirly shapes going on too. Nothing all that colorful, just a lot of liquid motion. And then all of a sudden, out of the darkness, came a bright, obvious, abrupt shape that looked like something plastic. It was so quick, and gone just like that, but I thought I recognized some kind of grid, like would encase a radio. A white plastic grid. So I thought about this for a minute, wondering if there was anything in the room like that. The only thing that would qualify was the plastic grid on the window fan, which still sits in place in the window. I thought maybe I was being shown her location in the room, because it is certainly something I have asked her to show me in the past. Why else would I see something that is so clearly from our era, and not hers? Then something else started. These images started at the top of my inner-head vision, and slowly drifted to the bottom, but they faded out about halfway down. What were they, is the question. I don’t know what they were. They were complicated little objects. Each time I saw one, and I was “shown” about 5 or 6 maybe, they were different in their details, but more or less the same in their overall structure. What could I even use to compare them to, in order to get even a rough idea of what I “saw”? I can’t think of anything, although they also seemed to be clearly from “our” time, and not native-American time, in that they seemed to be of modern materials. They were small, intricate, complicated little statues, for lack of any other word or description. They were overall a solid color, like a very light grey or white, but they had some other kind of colors in very small areas. Like the “bodies” were white, and may have had some attachments with a touch of red or blue. But I’m not sure that they were even “bodies”, these could have been a robotic part, or even an object that was part of something else. There were a lot of strange details to them, if I could have just looked at them longer. Clearly, it is something for which I don’t have a great frame of reference, otherwise I could probably just say, “I saw a “blank”. Fill in that blank with whatever it was. But it was not like that. Almost surrealistic in a way, or a hallucination, like seeing things you have absolutely no idea or frame of reference for understanding, so you just look at it and marvel. “What is that?” you think, and there is no good answer. “Well, it kind of looks like…”, but you don’t even really know how to answer that. It’s just something you have never seen before. And what in our world could you pick up or run across, or be shown a picture of and not be able to at least have some clue, either what it’s made of, or what it is a part of, or even that it is a part of something, even if you don’t know what it might be. I’m at a loss. The image in my mind is starting to fade as well, so I’m left only with the impression of what I saw, and not the actuality of it. So that is pretty much as far as this one is going to go, and I will just log this one as an hour or so of “visions” that I cannot explain. Maybe Bob can shed some light on this one. I remember the first time I described that bizarre, intricate insect that I had a vision of, that had no seeming relevance to anything, until Bob explained that it was one of the 3 visions he had “asked” her to “show me”. And it turned out to be relevant to my life at that time; the insects were jewelry that we constructed. I wish I had a memory of that. Well, I guess I do, in a way, but it’s kind of a DNA or a cellular memory. Otherwise, why else would I have chosen tiny little seed beads to work with as a child, and make jewelry and flowers out of them. I think there is a reason for just about everything that we do and every “so-called choice” that we make. We think that we are making a choice – that we have free will – but do we? Are we perhaps just programmed to do things?

One other thing bears mentioning today, as I’m still reading that book about local ghost sitings. And these are the kind of passages that I’ve taken notice of on my second read of it as the author relates the stories and the “ghostly” experiences he and others have had over time. He does relate the stories as “ghost” stories, obviously, given the title. But then, now that I’m towards the end of the book, he entertains other possibilities, rather than “ghosts”. So with credit to the author, here is a direct quote from the book:

“As they were talking, the light tapping sound of an object falling onto the floor interrupted the silence around them. The sound startled them and they began looking about for an explanation.

It wasn’t long before they came across a black, apparently old, button.

They looked over their clothing and around the room to see if there was any way either of them had lost a button, or if there was any apparent object from which it could have fallen.

Neither of them was wearing black buttons. No other object could be found.

Could this be a button lost in the same space but at some other time in the building’s past – one fallen from a child’s shirt or pants, or even those of the schoolmaster?

Like photos of the past which inform our present, our experiences of the unknown give us snapshots of a different realm of being that seems to overlap, and sometimes share space in, our mortal world.”

And there it is: “Overlap, and sometimes share space in, our mortal world.”
So we are not alone in this.

December 2, 2010

Event #149: Thursday, December 2, 2010


I talked to Bob Thursday night from work. Somewhere early in the conversation, he kind of randomly launched this statement:

“The sweat lodge is not that common among the tribes of the east and the north, it was primarily Lenape”.

“Okay…”, I responded… “but what brought that up?”
“She told me this. Tonight. While I was making the fire downstairs.”
“Really. Did you ask about that?” I wondered.
“No, I have no idea why she was telling me, it was just one of those things.” Bob responded.
I wondered, “How was she conveying this idea to you, I mean, I can understand that you knew it was about a sweat lodge, but how do you know the part that it’s unique to them, that other tribes didn’t really use it?”
“I don’t know, it’s just in pictures.” Bob responds. “Sometimes she uses language but it doesn’t matter, I can’t understand it, I can understand the pictures.”
“But how is she saying that they use it, and not other Indian cultures?” I asked.
“The pictures are just kind of ‘dropped in’… I don’t know, but it was clear that she was trying to convey or impart some knowledge. I see different tribes, and she indicates ‘us… us’. I get the idea somehow. It’s almost like it’s telepathic. It’s like she’s telling me and trying to get me to understand the words too.”

Then he went on to explain about the use of the plants and the herbs:
“Different types of plants and herbs were put on the hot rocks, they were aromatic, and the smells, the aromas were what triggered her abilities. She was obviously gifted from the beginning, but this helped to trigger it. She was dressed in long, buckskin trousers, and a long dress, like a tunic, to her knees.” Bob added.

I asked if he knew why she could not communicate to me in pictures the same way.
“I can’t answer that”, was the answer.

From "real-dream-catchers.com": Construction and Symbolism of the Sweat Lodge -- one of the sites I found that night of searching

So something bears mentioning here, and that is the fact that I’ve been thinking about sweat lodges. Not just thinking about them either, one night I went on the internet looking for pictures, and information. I found quite a bit. I wanted specifically though, to see one on the inside, and that image was a little harder to find. In fact, I am not sure that I did find anything. I looked at my finds again the next morning, as I’d left all the tabs open in my browser of what I’d found the night before. I think she must have picked up on that. Sometimes I think she must be in the room here with me too. She certainly has done some things in here at times.

December 3rd, but speaking about the previous evening:
No new movements in the room, except I heard the buzz in the driveway again, basically as soon as I got out of the truck, then I was in the bathroom and had the sensation the room was swimming in liquid motion. And this was before I had a glass of wine. In fact, for the past two nights, upon laying down in bed, I have gotten the sense of motion and images in my head. I can’t really be any more descriptive than that. I try to zone in on something, but to no avail. I cannot focus on all the visions being sent my way; it’s almost like moving down a fast tube like in a roller coaster, and not being able to see what’s is passing by you as you stream along.

October 25, 2010

Event #125: Monday, October 25, 2010


I wrote this email to Bob this morning:
I didn’t sleep well either. Lost a good 3 and a half hours of sleep. I had the sense she was there for a lot of it (like when you got up?), also when I went to bed. But nothing else happened, maybe some weird liquid motion images. At one point during the night, I had what I would call a “vision”, but it was so quick and so instantaneous, that I really have no sense what it was, except again, this one was in motion. Like a moving scene. Sort of like looking at something outside, and there is motion in it, something moving from left to right, but you see it so quickly, you have no idea what it was. And unlike my last “motion” scene, this one was not white-on-grey, it was normal outside colors, like it was a “real” scene. The things in it, immediate as the impression was, looked “real” also, not like representational images as the last one had looked.

Bob verified later that day that she had in fact “been there” during those periods that I had sensed it. I am now getting this hum/vibration in my ear when she is there. I have described this before: it is sort of like an electrical hum – or maybe more like the lowest string on a bass fiddle being dragged over by the bow very softly – and kind of loud/soft, loud/soft: an undulating sound. This sound is how I have come to know that she is “there”. I think this may have become apparent to me, because finally, after a long, hot summer and fall, it has cooled down enough that we can finally retire the air conditioner, and even sometimes sleep with the fans off. Hallelujah. It is quiet. Well, it is quiet because THOSE motors are silenced… and now, I can pick up this vibration sound that may have been there all along!

The Quarantined, potentially rabid, outdoor cat "OIN". He is NOT happy. However, he is not the one getting the rabies shots. This picture is titled, "OIN says Waah"

Tonight, when I came home from a harrowing day (Four freakin’ hours in the ER because of my first day of rabies shots – I think I may have been exposed through the outdoor cat “Oin”)… I went upstairs and there are changes on the dresser and my bedside table. It involves her stone – a heart – a turtle charm – Bob, me & Nuttah on the table, and the big heart charm. Those are the things that I noticed have moved. If I have time tomorrow, I will take some pictures. I must go to bed, my butt hurts like hell from the 4 stinkin’, big-ass syringes, and I’m tired from lack of sleep. It has been a long day. And I have 3 more ER visits for these shots looming in the immediate future. Stupid Oin. He probably doesn’t even have rabies.

October 21, 2010

Event #124: Thursday, October 21, 2010


Our emails of this morning:

Me: I’m pretty sure we had a visitor last night, both when I went to bed 12:30-ish, and later, I woke up and had a pretty clear vision. This one was again odd, kind of a white-on-grey look; I thought my eyes were open (that’s how clear this was), but they weren’t. It was a white flying bird, sort of a dove shape, or more just representational of a bird. In this vision, things were moving, rather than just a still image, which is what I usually get. There were other shapes/things in the image, maybe a turtle, and some other animals. I don’t have a clear idea of what they were. The whole scene moved from left to right, the bird kind of overlapping or moving faster than the things behind it, and sometimes obscuring them, maybe that’s why I don’t have that clear idea of what they were. It’s like trying to remember everything in a picture you only saw once. I guess the interpretation is that of a white bird flying across a sky background, with other objects behind it. Think white paper cut-outs on a gray sky, the whole thing was kind of 1-dimensional. Oh, and also, the wolves and silver heart are on the dresser again, not your side table.

Bob: I moved the puppies, and you are correct in your interpretation. Nuttah woke me at about 10 something. I “asked” about the birdie. It has to do with history/mythology and acceptance. It is a good thing. You were being shown a sort of truncated “history in pictures”. She mentioned she would be back frequently last night and for the next few nights to see An’na. Have fun. I love you AwupAn’na

Me: Yeah, remember I read in that “Horse Boy” book that the sighting of the white ibex by the travelers into Outer Mongolia meant they were being accepted by the “spirits” of the area; it was a good thing. The fact that it was white was what was important. I will find the quote from the book. The author also clearly draws a parallel between the nomads he meets there in 2008 with our Native Americans of today, and they used Teepees, not the traditional house called a “ger” of the Mongolians. I did have other visions besides that one I described, but none were as clear or concise — I went to sleep with the swirly moving colors that I sometimes get that indicated to me she was there. But this time accompanied by the loud hum. The hum was there a lot last night. I love you, awupAn’na

Later same day:

I talked to Bob tonight from work, and he verified that the white bird that he’s been seeing, over and over now at the same intersection, has been “shown” to him. This was verified last night in that “10 something” email. And then I had my white bird “sighting” last night. So is anyone else seeing the bird that Bob sees at this intersection or is it just Bob? Is it really just there for him? And if so… why there?? Very Curious. I drive through the same intersection twice a day too… never seen anything, as far as I know. Must be something about it though. (It is quite near the Neshaminy Creek… )

Also, there is a change tonight on the dresser . Bob’s wolves are arranged with the Oaxacan rabbit to their right, and her special stone is in front of them. I don’t know the significance of this one at all. I think the rabbit plays somehow into the whole thing – I had one show up on my desk, and one still sits on our vanity mirror top, where it was moved from… can’t remember where. Downstairs somewhere I believe.

October 16, 2010

Event #119: Sunday, October 16, 2010


I did not sleep well last night. Well, the first few hours were okay, til about 2:30 or so. Then I was up for a bit listening to Coast to Coast, which was ghost stories, and then people calling in with their most fearsome situation. Not exactly good stuff to sleep to. But then it started. Shortly before 5 AM I think, I started getting flashes of visions. Bright, clear, obvious visions, but not so obvious that I could tell what they were. I have impressions only. And the first was that of embossed white stationery with black writing on it. Paper with a raised or lowered section on it, like fancy note paper. This was “shown to me” a number of times and in a number of ways, and as it went on, I thought I could focus in on the writing and see it closer – if not what it said, but maybe the language or a word or two. But I never saw it long enough to get that. This was clearly something though that was coming from outside of my head; not a dream, not a thought, not something I would even think about or envision or that was related to anything I was hearing on the radio. In fact, by about 6, I turned the radio off, cause a really annoying infomercial came on. Also, I was awake, not dreaming. Consciously awake. Sometimes the black writing I saw made me think of Roman numerals. Or maybe it was Roman numerals. Something like XVII. When I saw it close, it was a very seriffed, ornate font, always black, always on the embossed white background. When I told these visions to Bob this morning, he suggested that maybe she was asking me a question. Like “What is this?” She has seen Bob’s writing down of her language in the notebook we keep on his bedside table. Perhaps she has also “seen” me doing this – the typing I sit and do here almost every night. (I always type in the “Times New Roman” font).  But that was not the only vision. There were others. Again, the bright ball, which I’m beginning to see is more like kind of “window” into a light area. Sometimes this window is the size of a golf ball, and I see little, but last night the ball seemed to expand a bit in size so I could see more. When it’s a golf ball size, it sometimes brings light to an object that I have no idea what I’m looking at. They seem to be metallic objects, with many features to them, like gears, or coils, or a piece of ancient machinery that I am not familiar with. (Makes me think of a computer game I loved to play years ago called “Riven”). Goldish, and silver; colors of metal things. Not bright and shiny, but duller like brass or bronze. They seem to be round, but that could just be that the window that is shedding the light is round. Is the window shedding the light? Or am I looking through this tiny round hole into a space that is large, and this is just what happens to fill the window space at that time. There were probably many other brief visions that I can’t remember now. Except for this one, which I saw a number of times. It was a colorful little scene that again, I couldn’t focus in on long enough to be able to say, “this was definitely this…” Again, just an impression. A scene, a little scene like a painting or a print, somewhat colorful, but mostly white, characters or objects in colors like red, green, blue, with black edges. If I was to try to draw it out, I might make some long triangular shapes and use a rectangle of color to represent an arm or a leg. And it was just multiple representational shapes like this and they might have moved around, or relocated. The impression of movement though, I think comes from somewhere else. It’s the sensation I get of fluidity, liquid motion, that seems to always be part of these “episodes”.

The 3 characters on my bedside table, the egg and the heart are all pointing at me

I fell asleep after that but when I awoke, I immediately noticed that our three characters, which were still on my bedside table, were now lined up looking right at me. They were placed in line with the blue egg and the heart, pointing right at me in the bed. I couldn’t help wondering if there was some connection there; I was almost certain that there was, having gone to bed almost “knowing” that something was going to happen that night.

Later this morning, I went out jogging again with Wobbles, and had a chance to think more clearly about the events – the images – of last night. It’s the last one that intrigues me; well, they all intrigue me, but this one, I’ve had a hard time remembering, although I am pretty sure she showed it to me a number of times. And I do know that this was her showing something to me. It makes me think of how she is with Bob, with the words or ideas, phrases that she is trying to get across. I have often looked at the page he writes it on, and you see a progression of writing as Bob struggles with hearing the word to try to get it right, and I often wonder (and have asked), what she does here. Is it like a teacher correcting him, and he scribbles out the word, and then writes it a different way:  “No, that’s still not right”, he scribbles it out again, tries again, ’til he gets it right and Nuttah is satisfied that the spelling is now close enough, and I can then go look it up and try to find out what the meaning is. Although when I do that, it is somewhat after the fact. Bob usually knows what it means as she says it; the meaning is conveyed in other ways rather than just the word itself. We are less aware of this I think, I mean we as a society, than the Native Americans were. Anyway, back to the pictures. The picture that she shows me in my head. I think this one came multiple times because I remember seeing it a number of ways, and yet I still didn’t “get” it. I’m thinking a painting – folk-art-like in some ways, characters represented and interpretable but not realism. I don’t know why I’m thinking “painting”. It was a representational scene of something, I believe, and quite intricate in its way. I wish I could see it again. I have left all of “us” lined up on my bedside table; perhaps tonight I will try to bring some more “energy” to my side of the bed somehow, what the hell, I’m willing to give up a good night’s sleep in order to see more. Also… it will be time soon to move to Part VI (6).

October 8, 2010

Event #114: Friday, October 8, 2010


And then the emails from the next morning:

From Bob: Looks like it was an uneventful night last night, guess Joe is just losing it. He followed me into the bathroom this morning and just stood there staring the whole time. “They see things we can’t”, no they’re just stupid.

Another, closer view of the Evening Primrose branch. It is about 10" long.

Mine to Bob: Huh. I left the flowers where you could see them, and they’re big. Right on the sink in the bathroom. And I was kind of expecting that after she left them you would have had some contact. That’s surprising. So I guess it was just the flowers. I think they are Evening Primrose, but one thing that is clear, especially because everything got flattened last week, is that they are not from our yard, or even from right around here. Just like the arrowhead plant, maybe it came from her time? No, Joe is not losing it, well maybe he is, but he was right about last night. I don’t know what happened in the morning. Also, I believe the flowers were left either right before or right after you talked to me last night, based on the level of wilting. I’m hoping to bring them back, but if they are Evening Primrose, they won’t open ’til tonight. They are not open this morning, 2 wilted away, but there’s 2 buds that might open later.

Bob: Hmmmmm… where were they left? I looked at your bedside table and saw the heart, so if the flowie was there it wasn’t before I talked to you, or was it elsewhere? I didn’t see it this morning, but no glasses and I’m on autopilot, so I’m not surprised. I did, however, see a cat in the bathroom. No contact at all last night. Maybe it was from before I came up and I just didn’t notice.
Wobble On.

Me: If you could see the heart on the bedside table, you would have seen the flowers. They were to the left, in front of the radio, on the front left corner. So that means, they came after you went to sleep, and before I came home. Which was late, since I had to food shop, but it makes sense with the level of wilting, I estimated they were probably there for 2-3 hours. I came up as soon as I got home, which was just after 11. And I hung up with you around 8:30, I think. It’s a rather large branch of flowers, you would not have missed them. Course, that’s what I thought when I left them on the sink! I will take a photo of where they were and send it to you. Oh. BTDubs. I was just out with the puppies waiting while wobbles did his business. And I looked over the wall and scared a flock of mergansers to flight. But suddenly it made me remember a dream I just had. I dreamt that an entire section of the new wall, from the drop down to the old wall, fell into the creek. Cleanly, sideways, just plunk, straight down, underwater sticking out to the other bank. I had come up to it, and the first thing I noticed was a new sound, like louder water. Then I saw through to the water, where I shouldn’t but it was taking my brain awhile to process this, because it had dropped so cleanly. When I realized what I was seeing I was of course mortified. Oh my God, HOW did THAT happen? And can the rest of it go? Then I had to go to tell you. It was just a “you better come here and see this” kind of thing. Oh boy. I wonder if she was around this morning. I think she was there when I was awake last night — now that I think of it. Describe how that “shimmer” looked to you when she was at the foot of the bed. I was in the bathroom around 1 or so, for about the 3rd time, and there were dancing objects in front of my eyes. Orange squares. Like sun reflecting off moving water, what that does to your eyes, but orange. And I was sitting in the dark. I closed them, and it was still there. I wonder if that was her energy? I had already moved the flowers into the bathroom and put them in my water bottle.

And I must say something about that dream. I totally forgot about it until I stood out there at the wall with the dogs. It was then that the dream just kicked in to my memory. But it was a REALLY alarming dream, I think we realized (in the dream) that the flood of last Friday had weakened the wall, and then that big section just fell over into the creek. It is kind of surprising that I was not awakened last Friday morning by this dream, when water really was threatening us. Or perhaps Nuttah knew that we would be alright. Because the bottom line is that all the work Stewie and I did turned out to be not necessary, but we didn’t know that at the time. Maybe she did though.

Later, that same day, Friday, October 8.
When we returned that night from dinner, I went right upstairs to change. Our neighbors were coming over and we were going to sit outside by the chiminea, and it was already getting cool. I would need to dress sloppy, and dress warm. The first thing I noticed coming up to the bedroom, was that Nuttah was missing from the top of the bureau. I checked Bob’s table, the windowsill, and then the last place: there she was on my bedside table, but she’d been obscured by the lamp. The heart-charm was still there too, and they both pointed at the bed. I left her there for a couple of days, then this morning, Bob put her back on the bureau.